from the inside out

I feel hollow tonight. Empty. Drained.
I read the news from Paris and feel sick.
I think of the young people at the concert and I think of my children and grandchildren.
This intraspecies war has been raging far too long.
I do not want to be afraid. I do not want my children to be afraid.
I don't want anyone to live in fear.
But when I hear world leaders saying that they will not give in to fear, I do not understand.
At a very deep level something is wrong and we can't pretend that just doing more of the same without being afraid can possibly work. Fear arises naturally. It is the warning our bodies give us when we need to be careful, to change our direction, take evasive action or rethink what we are doing.
However can people, mothers, fathers, lovers and others not be afraid when they see such carnage? such meaningless loss of life?

It sickens me that anyone or any group should kill innocent people.
But I wonder, what does it mean to be innocent? Not as an individual, I know what that means.
But as a species; are we innocent?
Can we be innocent if at the same time we remain unaware of how our actions affect others?
I believe in the goodness of people, my family, friends and neighbors, the people across the borders and around the world. People are people.

Mature and healthy people do not choose to intentionally hurt others when they go about their daily lives, going to work or school, shopping and cooking, tending to the sick and watching the little children. To be human is to care about others, to love and be loved, to wonder and learn, to create art and dance, to sing and enjoy the world in communion with others. How is it that so many of us have begun to move through the world distracted, protecting ourselves from others rather that reaching out to share in our humanity?

Something is wrong. It seems that some basic part of our humanity has become infected with something sick or evil, with something that is destroying our species from the inside out.
How can we attend to this threat if we allow innocence to absolve us from discernment? How is it that we can always blame those others - whoever they are - asserting that they never have a reason to rage? As if they have given up their humanity by choice, for no reason except a desire to continue killing.. How can that be?

What has happened to the human family? With some so wealthy that they are oblivious to the destitution of others, and some so poor that they cannot rise up? Yet most are just trying to live their lives, going about their activities sadly unaware that they have become disconnected from the world community; avoiding the reality that something is dreadfully wrong.

Until a moment like this forces us to stop and reflect.
Carnage again. It is not human. Something is wrong.

What should we do?