Fly Away

I had the opportunity to connect for a little while the other day with a friend who made a deep impression on my life. Over a pot of black tea in a lovely little tea shop, The Tea Zone, in downtown Portland we were able to catch up and to say good-bye before the imminent move that will take my friend away from this city.
There have been other times when someone important to me went away and there was no time to say good-bye, either because I did not know they were leaving or because I did not act on the desire to connect one last time, waiting instead until it was too late. Good byes, even those that are not permanent but will only be for some extended time, can be difficult especially when there is the added business of packing and storing things and many people who want a bit of time.  But I am glad that we were both able to find some mutually acceptable space in our day to connect.
It is energizing to encounter a kindred spirit, or have time with someone who is fully present to offer their wisdom and listen to yours. I believe that all of the connections that we make in this life remain, keeping us attached even when those connections are not as positive as we would have hoped. We give something of ourselves to everyone we meet and in return there is something given. Too often, unconsciously, but sometimes even with knowledge, we give silence, or indifference, or even dismissal because we are too busy to relate, too self absorbed to notice. In return we receive the same, or perhaps a snub or even a curse. It is far too easy to remain in our own world and miss being present to what is going on around us in time and place.
Many years ago I attended a workshop with a Benedictine Priest, Fr. Aidan Shea who addressed the common human practice of living life semi-consciously. Too tired or busy or distracted to be fully present in our own lives, we allow ourselves to drift without really being aware of where we are going or who or what might be in our path. We do things that we have been enculturated or programmed to do by our families or society at large without paying attention to the damage or hurt that might be associated with our actions unless it is immediately in front of us. If we do something with consequences out of our range of vision, we remain blissfully unaware. We need help to see beyond our narrow place in time.
Last night as I washed the dishes a mosquito flew into the sink and landed on my hand. Without thinking I immediately swatted at it. I felt discomfort that I didn't recognize even for a moment that there was life there, but honestly, I felt much more alarmed that the mosquito was there at all. It is March. Mosquitoes don't arrive until mid to late summer, except this year. The water level in the river is at August level and my friends who crew say they must take precautions against grounding their boats when normally at this time of year they are fighting strong currents in high water. Things are changing but we must be paying attention, be really present to our surroundings if we expect to recognize the signs before it is utterly too late to make the connections between the way we are living and the way that nature is shifting course.
Friends take flight and mosquitoes land. In everything there is connection.